Day 54: Pedal, Pedal, Pedal... El Scorcho!

On those days when I get to stay in a hotel, I suck every last ounce out of the experience that I can… I bathe at least 3 times… the TV is constantly running… same with the AC unit… Even if the outside temperature is perfect… I will run the AC unit if just to try and match the weather outside. I stay in my room until 10:55am the next morning and just barely make the checkout time… But today the housekeeping service would have none of my shenanigans… They would knock on my door every 5 minutes starting at 9:30am and remind me that checkout is at 11:00am. I was taking a bath and listening to the recent Patton Oswalt standup album, trying to relax…. But they were fiercely intent on cleaning my room. I stayed until 10:58am just to spite them, and hurried to the checkout counter at 10:59 so as not to get charged a late fee. I felt pretty good about my petty little victory, and so I got moving…

I was feeling great all morning (the first hour)… The shoulder was small and rocky, but I took joy in riding in the road. I was in a very oppositional mood… I unapologetically took up a lane of traffic… I sang along to punk songs like a troublesome teenager who had ridden his bike 2000 miles just to rebel against the “oppressive” society of Leeds, ND… Confident that the farmers were in awe of my youth and marveling at my derring-do, I sang along with Patti Smith at the top of my lungs across central North Dakota for the first hour.

But my derring-do eventually waned, and I got thoroughly bored of the never-changing landscape. It just stayed the same all day, for hours…. No change….

PEDAL, PEDAL, PEDAL... CORN

PEDAL, PEDAL, PEDAL… CORN

PEDAL, PEDAL, PEDAL… DEAD RACOON

PEDAL, PEDAL, PEDAL… CORN

Yeah, I think Dakota dementia is starting to set in. I spent an hour picking out songs I could do Karaoke to next time I am out with friends…

Look at this photo closely...

PEDAL, PEDAL, PEDAL… CORN

I meet two Eastbound cyclists from Canada… Ken and Sue… They are great people and give me some tips about the road ahead. Later in the day, as the headwind picks up, I start vilifying this sweet couple… Every gust of headwind is a sweet, sweet tailwind to them. Every ounce of opposition I encounter is their good fortune… I picture them laughing and hi-fiving at getting such a wonderful Eastbound wind… I think maybe I hate them.

PEDAL, PEDAL, PEDAL… DEAD SKUNK

I stop at a rest area and it’s nice and tranquil until 2 busloads of High School football players show up… I hate high school kids… and I don’t think it’s a symptom of my aging either… I’ve always hated high school kids. That’s why I hold some sort of amazing record for amount of classes skipped in High School. I’m still only as cantankerous now as I was when I was 16.

PEDAL, PEDAL, PEDAL… CORN

I daydream about starting a family band with my siblings… Our parents didn’t seem to impressed with our output. We cover that catchy Feist single!

PEDAL, PEDAL, PEDAL… RUGBY!

I get to Rugby, ND and as an act of defiance against the seemingly mandatory picture where I pose in front of the monument commemorating the Geographic Center of North America… I instead take a picture of me looking at the Monument (from the Monuments POV)…

I check into THE HUB Motel/Pub/Diner… I am so grateful to Barb Lee for setting this up for me. The headwinds today were a little stronger than I was expecting, and I arrived into town pretty exhausted. This is a bad sign… It was a low mileage day and the headwinds weren’t THAT bad. I need to ante up and get back in the game. This hotel is a lifesaver… and the 1970’s décor is pretty inviting and womb-like.

I take a nap as the sun sets. Walk to the gas station and get a soda. It’s cold out, and I am still getting that lonely vibe from the state. I think it’s just THE WEST…

Tomorrow will be more of the same…. (PEDAL X 3… CORN/ROADKILL)

On a more serious note, allow me to expose my neurosis for a second… I get distressed every time I pass a dead animal… I look at the spilled entrails and can’t help but note that I probably share a few of those same innards. I’m not ashamed to say that this part of the country scares me. It’s so empty, and the sparseness makes me nervous. But it’s beautiful here; I’ll get used to not having the security of population density… and in 9 days I will be at Glacier National Park.

PEDAL, PEDAL, PEDAL…

Just kidding... I had to get the photo...